The World According To E, Ryan and The Girl

personal safety with Lily

Lily: I learned all about "stranger danger."

Me: You did? What does that mean?

Lily: It means you have to stay by your family or a stranger may come and take you off to college.

Lily's important questions

Lily has gotten to the point where she has a question about EVERYTHING and, because Lily is Lily, she wants immediate answers to her questions. This sort of thing is happening to me now all. the. time.

Me (on phone): Sure, that sounds like a good idea.

Lily: Daddy!

Me: (on phone) It's just a matter of cost really.

Lily: DADDY!

Me: (on phone) Excuse me one second please.

Lily: DADDY!

Me: Lily, what is it? Can't you see I'm on the phone?

Lily: Why don't bears live in houses?

pickup time

Every day when she gets in the car, I ask Lily what she did that day. Generally, I get an answer like this one.

Me: So how was your day?

Lily: Good. 

Me: What did you do today?

Lily: We played kitchen.

Me: That sounds like fun.

Lily: Yes! I was the baby dragon!

Indiana Jones and the Patients of Doom

Ethan and I were playing Family Feud on the iPad and the question was "Name a profession where people have to listen to other people's problems."

He looked at me thoughtfully and said "archaeologist?"

clouds

E and I were playing the game where you look at the sky and try to find clouds that look like things. Most people wait until they see one that really reminds them of something...but not E. He tried to identify each cloud.

Me: That one looks like a flying bird!

E: Look! That one looks like fat lion with a jet pack!

Me: What?

E: And there's a girl with helicopter legs!

Me: Uh...

E: And there's a triceratops with no head!

Me: ...

E: And there's a flying horse with no legs!

probably better if I don't know

Lily just ran by me and quickly up the stairs with pot-holders on her feet.

I wonder what her plan is with that.

what books is E reading

E: Daddy, you know I don't like to read books more than once.

Me: No?

E: No, because you're reading it and you're like "I already know the frog dies...so whatever."

E's upcoming Halloween plan

E: I'm not going to dress up for Halloween.

Mom: What?

E: This year I've decided I'm going to sell candy.

why have just one

Lily: Mommy, two is my favorite number.

Mom: Really? Why is it two?

Lily: And four.

Mom: Oh, two and four. Very nice.

Lily: And six and seven.

Mom: Uh...

Lily: And 92.

E's clumsy date

E: I want to go back to the park today because that girl is going to be there.

Me: What girl? 

E: The one that was riding her bike and kept falling.

Me: A girl that kept falling off her bike told you to meet her at the park today?

E: Yes, you remember the one...she kept following me around.